"It's not my fault!" -- Teaching Responsibility

How many times have you heard your students say it?

How many times have you read it in the newspaper?

Seen it on TV?

"It's not my fault!"

Did it come to a head when a lawyer sued McDonald's because someone claimed to have become overweight from eating french fries?

How do we teach our students to be RESPONSIBLE for their own actions?

THOMAS GORDON, in both his Teacher Effectiveness & Parent Effectiveness Training programs (T.E.T. & P.E.T.), talks about the idea of "problem ownership." Frequently, when students are having a problem, they either bring it to an adult to solve for them and/or the adult "steps in" uninvited. As soon as that happens, Gordon points out, the adult has assumed ownership of the problem. Now the adult needs to make an independent judgment and it usually results in a win-lose situation. One child gets what he/she wants, one child doesn't. You can read more about his approach at the Thomas Gordon Website.

Does it have to be this way?

By guiding children through a series of problem solving steps the adult can teach students how to solve their own disputes and make good decisions so that solutions are win-win. Gordon suggests that teachers help students solve problems and make better decisions through a simple six step process.

• Step 1: Identify and define the problem or situation. A good solution will depend on accurately identifying the problem at hand. The teacher or administrator might consider asking questions like these: "What is really going on here?" "What problems are we having?" "What exactly do we need to solve or do?" and "is there another bigger problem here?"
• Step 2: Generate alternatives. Once the problem is cleared, a number of possible solutions can be generated. To help bring these ideas to light, teachers and administrators may find questions and statements such as the following to be helpful: "What can we do differently?" What rules or procedures do we need to follow?" "Let's see how many ideas we can come up with." and "Are there still more solutions we can think of?"
• Step 3: Evaluate the alternative suggestions. When alternatives have been specified, participants are asked to comment on them. The goal here is to discover a solution agreeable to all. The teacher or administrator might ask each for aproposal, "What do you think of this suggestion?" "What are its advantages and disadvantages?" "What problems does it leave unsolved?" and "if we try this idea, what do you think will happen?"
• Step 4: Make the decision. After examining the alternatives, the one that seems to suit most people best can be selected for trial.
• Step 5: Implement the solution or decision. The trial solution is put into place with the understanding that it may or may not work as anticipated and that it can be changed if necessary.
• Step 6: Conduct a follow-up evaluation. The results of the trial solution or decision are analyzed and evaluated. At this point the teacher or administrator might ask such questions as these: "Was this a good decision?" "Did it solve the problem?" "Is everyone happy with the decision" and "How effective was our decision?" If the solution or decision is judged to be satisfactory, it is kept in place. If unsatisfactory, a modified or new solution is proposed and put to the test.

As you can see, the process encourages participants in the problem (the two students who got into an argument, for example) to be RESPONSIBLE for a solution to this problem. With the help of a couple of questions from the teacher or principal, of course.

You do not need to buy into all of Gordon's ideas to implement his approach. Simply understanding the questioning process will help encourage students to begin to solve their own problems.

We believe when students work their way through solutions to their own problems, those problems will tend to stay solved. Those students will not get into trouble again.

This is one of the foundations of the Discipline Learning Packet System put forth by the Advantage Press. When a student gets into trouble, he is given reading material to help walk him through this questioning process. He writes answers to questions that help guide him to set goals to improve his own behavior.

As one impressed principal noted, "They WRITE their wrongs!"

The Discipline Learning Packets have been used in Elementary, Middle and High schools since 1987. Look at the results of a survey on their use.

• Iraq's dropout rate among secondary school children is more than 65%.
• 50% of all Iraqi girls over 15 have had no education at all.
• The average Iraqi boy over 15 has spent fewer than five years in school.
• More than 50% of the schools in Iraq had no electricity or water BEFORE the war.
• The average Iraqi teacher earns the equivalent of $5.00 (US) per month.